So most people know that if they ever want to set fire to something, I am not the person they should call on for help, because I suck at starting things on fire. Seriously. I can’t even get a cigarette lighter lit. Nor can I set fire to a fire-starter log, which is made out of extremely flammable material. So everyone pretty much knows that. But if you ever want to rob a house, yeah… don’t call me to help you, because I will find the one thing to knock over, and it will make the loudest noise you could possibly make in the middle of the night. Oh, and…