Polka dot dress and striped headscarf

Polka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.comPolka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.com Lately, I have realized something about myself: I don’t like making new friends.

Now, that’s not to say I don’t like people. I love people! I loved growing up next to my uncle who had nine kids; I love my in-laws and their huge family; I loved working as a barista and a secretary and chatting to new customers daily; I love throwing big parties and being the recipient of big parties.

But making new friends is something else. Maintaining a new relationship past the awkward “how much do I share/we need to hang out often” stage and into the “I will tell you everything/we could go months without seeing each other and be okay” flow is just… hard. Making new friends totally drains me. And to be honest, so does staying at big parties without my “anchor” person (my husband, best friend, or friends I’ve known for ages), being expected to socialize with people I rarely see, or, sometimes, being at family events from either side when there are many children running around with minimum supervision. (All the kids are fairly well behaved, mind you, but still.)

Polka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.comPolka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.com I’m not sure why this is. I’m a friendly person. I’m known for liking to talk. I don’t find it hard to converse; in fact, I find it hard to stop talking sometimes. However, that’s my “mask”; some people retreat into themselves when faced with strangers, I talk about anything and everything to hide the fact that I feel awkward and nervous. Perhaps that’s part of why I always feel drained in new friendships; I feel as though I have to fill the silence so nobody feels awkward, because I’ve been in so many situations where there was silence and I felt awkward.

Perhaps it’s my tendency to take charge. Kids need corralling? I will head them off. Dishes need clearing? I’ll take those. People want attention? I’ll try to make them feel comfortable if I can. New friends aren’t talking much? I’ll make up for it by oversharing! And by the end, I’m just craving alone time, to sit by myself and not be spoken to or needed, to recharge in the quiet, to not have to talk or entertain. Polka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.com Polka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.com

I told my husband once that making new friends is hard, and he laughed at me. I am very much the more outwardly social person in our relationship, and someone on the outside might classify me as the extrovert and him as the introvert. But after reading articles about extroverts and introverts, how they gain energy, what they need, what they hate, what they like… I think really, I’m just an outgoing introvert, and my husband is a shy extrovert. I need quiet and alone time to recharge — introvert status. He loves big groups and gets energy from a crowd — extrovert all the way. I would gladly entertain myself with a book all day and not have to talk to anyone — definite introvert. He needs to see people and do things to pass the time — definite extrovert. He considers everyone his friend. I only consider people I actually hang out with consistently my friends (everyone else? acquaintances.)Polka dot dress and striped headscarf | www.eccentricowl.com

Shirt, dress, and belt, thrifted | boots, Kohl’s | headscarf, Modcloth | glasses, c/o Firmoo | earrings, Target

And, though I am the “talkative” one, I actually prefer friends who talk more than I do, because then I don’t feel as though I have to entertain them, while he prefers people who let him talk too. So while outwardly, I look more social and he’s the quiet one, inwardly, I think our roles are flipped. At home, with just him I tend to be the quiet one while he is the talkative one. I tend to sit in my corner at well-known friends’ parties, while he’s the one hanging out and talking and being the social butterfly (of sorts; his talkative is not like my talkative.) When I’m really comfortable with people, I tend to observe and listen rather than talk and entertain.

It’s been quite eye-opening to me; it explains why I like blog friendships (on my terms, in my pajamas, no pressure to chat on the spot) and why I can talk to anyone at church or, in the past, work, but feel less comfortable pursuing relationships outside of those areas. It explains why I, the “social” one, don’t like going places where there will be new people I have to talk to. It explains why I preferred my job as a barista, where no customer could befriend me outside of work and there were no holiday events, to my job at Hallmark, where there were holiday parties with employees I had to attend that felt too intimate for a work relationship.

And I know labels are beginning to be old news, that people redefine who they are every day, but I like “fitting” a certain mold. Maybe I’m not an obvious one, but knowing I am more an introvert than extrovert is comforting. I’m not just really weird for being social but not liking having to make new friends.

What about you? Do you consider yourself to be more of an extrovert or an introvert? Shy or outgoing? No label? In between? I am curious to know if there are more people like me.

Happy Wednesday!

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Vintage plaid and a flower crown

Vintage plaid and a flower crown | www.eccentricowl.comVintage plaid and a flower crown | www.eccentricowl.com I have been wanting to wear this pretty plaid dress from Stranger Bird Vintage ever since I got it (along with this gorgeous bohemian dress), but it needs a little bit of tailoring. Which I knew when I chose it, but uh… girl should have known better. I’m SO bad at fixing the clothing I get right away, and I’ll admit that I’ve had skirts sit in my “hem” pile for six months. Hemming literally takes like ten minutes.

So I’m quite glad that being pregnant has helped fill the dress out a little more, along with this belt, because I’m not sure where my sewing machine is any more and today was the perfect day for a vintage plaid dress. The sun is shining, my flower crown was calling, and I decided I could just make this work without tailoring it for now. Vintage plaid and a flower crown | www.eccentricowl.com  Lately I’ve been feeling like I really need to step it up with eating healthy and taking (easy) walks every day that I can. It’s crazy how even in accepting the changes in my body, this pregnancy is super different from the last one. I did start out 10lbs heavier this time around, which makes it harder. Starting out 10lbs heavier and then having gained 10lbs during the last 17 weeks means I’m already nearing the max weight of my first pregnancy. I don’t feel like I look any heavier than I did last time, but the numbers and the way my pants fit are telling me I am.

The thing I have the hardest time with is breakfast and lunch. By the time I get Asa fed, I’m far too lazy to make myself food as well, and I really, really need to just find meals to put together that will feed both of us instead of two separate things for him and for me. I also go the easy route these days feeding him — there’s been a lot of oatmeal for his breakfast lately, which I can’t eat.

Vintage plaid and a flower crown | www.eccentricowl.com Vintage plaid and a flower crown | www.eccentricowl.com I know part of it is just laziness — however excusable that is, being pregnant and chasing around a 14 month old — but the other part is truly the fact that I still have a LOT of food aversions and on a day to day basis, my stomach’s preferences change. Some days, veggies and fruits sound fantastic. Other days, they make me queasy. I swear, if this child is not a girl, I will be shocked.

So I think I will try focusing more on getting myself moving on a daily basis, whether by taking a walk in the sun or by doing a good prenatal yoga routine on the rainy days, and limiting the “bad” foods to an actual serving size instead of, you know, the entire bag of M&M’s. (Okay, I haven’t done that yet. But it sounds really good.)Vintage plaid and a flower crown | www.eccentricowl.com

Dress, c/o Stranger Bird Vintage | flower crown, self-made | belt and shoes, thrifted

I definitely don’t think being pregnant gives me the “right” (or whatever you want to call it) to eat whatever I want. I mean, we don’t suddenly become garbage disposals once we’re gestating. But with food aversions and cravings, I believe it’s definitely okay to give yourself some leeway while pregnant; when you actually cannot stomach anything but ice cream, it’s better to just eat the ice cream than starve, you know?

Mental health is important, too.

I hope you are all having a wonderful week! Happy Thursday!

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Striped maternity dress and red cardigan

Striped maternity dress and red cardigan | www.eccentricowl.comStriped maternity dress and red cardigan | www.eccentricowl.com   In eight days, we will find out what the gender of this baby is. I am SO excited, and very curious to see if my gut feeling and all of the old midwives tales are true. I already automatically refer to the baby as the gender my gut tells me it is, even though there’s a 50% chance I’m totally wrong, and when I accidentally referred to it as that specific gender, my husband went “Oh, really?”

He refuses to guess, because he doesn’t want to get his hopes up either way. Striped maternity dress and red cardigan | www.eccentricowl.com Striped maternity dress and red cardigan | www.eccentricowl.com My guess is a girl, though. This pregnancy has been so very different from Asa’s that I’m hoping my instincts are right. I still can’t stand overly meaty dishes; I still get gaggy and occasionally have to throw up in the morning, I crave sugar all the time… I can’t drink water or talk in the mornings due to that pesky gag reflex… it’s interesting. I also feel like the baby might be sitting lower this time, which is usually normal since it’s baby 2 and muscle are all more relaxed. Striped maternity dress and red cardigan | www.eccentricowl.com

Maternity dress, earrings, and cardigan, Target | shoes, Modcloth | belt, thrifted | Glasses, c/o Firmoo

We will see on April 1st whether I’m right or wrong! Meanwhile, I will be researching fun ways to reveal the gender to our families. If you have any good ideas, let me know!

Happy Tuesday!

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The Girl with Glasses

The Girl with Glasses | www.eccentricowl.comThe Girl with Glasses | www.eccentricowl.comI have had glasses since I was about eleven or twelve. I don’t remember the exact age, but I do remember the first night I went to our small town church’s youth group after picking up my new pair of spectacles, feeling nervous about the change, wondering if I would get dubbed the nerd or if anyone would even care. After being there for five minutes, the boy I had a crush on said he really liked my  new glasses, and it was set. I was pleased to be the girl with glasses.

Of course, as I got older and we didn’t have the money to update my frames, I started to get embarrassed about them; they were round, metal, with speckles of rainbow colors on the rims, and at 15 I was not so happy with the choice my 11 year old self had made. They were stupid, juvenile, and made me feel like  a kid. So I ceased to wear my glasses unless I had to watch a movie or, after I got my license, drive.The Girl With Glasses | www.eccentricowl.com

Then, finally, at 20, we were able to update my prescription (which badly needed it) and frames, and I was happy with my choice for about two years. The new frames were these, and I wore them for a few years without feeling too embarrassed. But again, I eventually started to feel like they were very much outdated and not in line with what I wanted my style to be, and went through the cycle of being blind for beauty and only wearing the frames when I was forced. I got so used to an old prescription and not being able to see that I barely noticed how bad my eyesight was.

Until I got to work with Firmoo, update my prescription, and nab the first pair of retro-style frames I’ve ever owned. In the last few years I’ve been able to review quite a few pairs of glasses, and slowly my choices have been tweaked to frames that are much more in line with the aesthetic of my style. The Girl With Glasses | www.eccentricowl.com

These days, I love wearing glasses. Just the other night, my husband asked me when I was going to get contacts, and I was surprised to find myself responding “maybe never!” I’ve become so attached to the idea of myself as a girl with glasses that I don’t know if I want to get contacts. Of course, contacts might be nice for the occasional day when I want to go all-out glamor and still see, but most days… the glasses are a part of me. They represent the nerdy side, the writer side; they offer a sort of mask to hide behind when I’m feeling less-than cute and need something to distract from a few pimples; they are yet another accessory that I think adds greatly to my daily style, and I love them.The Girl With Glasses | www.eccentricowl.comThe Girl With Glasses | www.eccentricowl.com

I will probably get contacts eventually, but I don’t think I will ever stop being the girl with glasses. It’s just who I am, and who I want to be. Especially when I can get frames as gorgeous as these!The Girl With Glasses | www.eccentricowl.com

Skirt, belt, flower, and shoes, thrifted | top, Target | glasses, c/o Firmoo

Do you wear glasses? If so, are they prescription, or just for fun? What aesthetic most appeals to you — retro, hipster, nerdy, modern…?

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

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Maternity Wardrobe: 1970’s hippie dress and the honesty of Mondays.

Maternity Wardrobe: 1970's hippie dress  | www.eccentricowl.com The honesty of a Monday following a bad night’s sleep and a nearly-canceled (but thankfully, not) thrifting trip to meet a friend whom I had only ever met via blogging and Facebook: today is a day sans makeup, with unbrushed hair hastily pinned into some semblance of a topknot, and earrings only worn because of the discovery of this dress while thrifting.  Maternity Wardrobe: 1970's hippie dress  | www.eccentricowl.com And, while I am being honest, I am only blogging today because of my love for this dress and my being accustomed to blogging five times a week. It is hard to break the habit once the habit has formed, and in the new year I have made blogging less of a priority over other things in life… but I miss it. Some days. Maternity Wardrobe: 1970's hippie dress  | www.eccentricowl.com Being a stay-at-home mom, many weeks Facebook and the blogosphere are my only forms of socialization outside of the constant one-sided conversations I have with Asa. Thus, though I only slept four hours last night due to a semi-sick child, I could not make myself cancel meeting Myranda, finally, even though extra naps today would have been much appreciated. I was so glad to see a face I felt I knew (I know all of her siblings, but had never met her), and at least for my part, it was a wonderful trip with no awkwardness.

Though I may have talked more than I should have, which is something I do when I meet new people. Maternity Wardrobe: 1970's hippie dress  | www.eccentricowl.comVintage dress, thrifted | earrings, gift | boots, JC Penney

And, in keeping up with the honesty of today, I will admit that instead of being a productive mother, I am going to rescue Asa from the confines of his crib (where he should be napping, but has instead resisted and resorted to pitiful tears) and we are going to watch Disney movies until my husband gets home.

It is Monday, after all. These days should be taken slowly, and with lots of snacks. 😉

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