Vintage paisley dress, knee high boots, and thoughts on standing out

Standing On My Own | eyreeffect.comStanding On My Own |

Standing On My Own

When I first started fashion blogging, I always wanted to blog about items that were easily accessible. I felt like it was better to share items that others could snag if they really loved what I was wearing. And, I wanted to fit in. I wanted to wear the dresses my fellow bloggers wore, to emulate the styles they created, to be one of the “cool” bloggers. At the time, I was all about trying to get my hands on anything retro-cute; Modcloth, Forever 21, Target, etc.

As I transitioned more and more into vintage style, it became about the reproduction styles everyone else had. The PUG skirts, the Bernie Dexter dresses, the BAIT shoes, the Modcloth sweaters. I wanted to emulate. It was all about fitting in, sharing accessible style, and creating a space where others could take what I had and make it their own.

Standing On My Own |

Most of what I blogged about, though, I did not wear because I was 100% in love with that style, but because I was too afraid to branch out and commit to the look I really resonated with. It’s been a reoccurring theme in my life: wanting to please others, to fit in, and to be part of the “it” crowd. Not in an active, scrabbling way, but subconsciously.

Until now. Standing On My Own | eyreeffect.comStanding On My Own |

Something has changed in the last few months and I am settling into my own.

Largely thanks to Lotty Dotty Vintage, whose affordable prices have allowed me to purchase the vintage dresses that I used to only dream about. I started to purchase vintage and purge the retro-cute, and as my closet transforms so does my attitude. I find myself being more assertive with sponsorship offers, less afraid to say no. Less afraid to purge things that I love even though they don’t fit my style aesthetic. Bolder to walk around during errands dressed to the toes like a 1950’s housewife.

Towards the latter half of this year, I have felt more confident in contacting companies that I admire, to work with them. I used to feel as though I wasn’t good enough; my blog wasn’t unique enough, or my photography wasn’t stellar enough; I didn’t post adventure-outfit posts, I didn’t wear the right brands, I didn’t have the right face or the right body. I wasn’t like everyone else, so I didn’t feel like I was worthy of what everyone else did. Standing On My Own |

But now? I’m not like everyone else, and it’s a thrilling feeling. There is no one in my town who dresses like me. If there is, I haven’t seen her yet. And for the first time, I’m not afraid to be unique. Ten years ago I was so afraid to stand out that I denied myself all of the pretty dresses I loved and wore baggy jeans and cheap tee shirts to try to fit in. I was afraid people would say I was being fake if I dressed up every day. I was afraid of being put in the spotlight, or being questioned about my choices, or being mistaken as stuck up for wearing a dress when everyone else was wearing jeans.

Standing On My Own | eyreeffect.comStanding On My Own |

They often say that women blossom and grow strongest in their thirties. I’ve got a little over a year until I hit that age, and I think it’s really true. I don’t really care what people think of my aesthetic any more, but most people react positively. I wish I had been brave enough when I first started this blog to just go for what I really wanted, and not be afraid of being a little different.

I envy bloggers like Skye, who is right around the age that I was when I started blogging, and has already started to settle into her amazing vintage style. I wish I had been that brave at her age. I am so inspired by her. Even before she fell into her vintage aesthetic, she was unafraid to wear and share what she wanted to wear and only what she wanted to wear. As crazy as she may have looked, it was always 100% authentically herself. Standing On My Own | eyreeffect.comStanding On My Own | eyreeffect.comStanding On My Own |

I have been asked before what advice I would give to budding bloggers, and as cliche as it sounds, it’s the best advice anyone could ever have given me:

Be yourself.

As someone who has traveled a style journey here on this blog for 7+ years, I know how tempting it is to emulate and recreate and try to fit in with the crowd you admire. It’s something we all do in life in one way or another, be it how we dress or how we talk or what we admit to watching or eating. Sometimes, it feels like you are following your own dreams but then you wake up and realize you’ve borrowed them from someone else. Often, I fall into loving something just because it’s a popular thing to love, or people expect it to be my thing. Admitting that it’s not for me is hard, especially when I know others really just want me to be happy and are making an effort towards that happiness.

And it’s okay to emulate those that you admire and to love popular things. But don’t forget to keep yourself in the mix. Instead of thinking “what would that blogger wear?” or “how would she put things together?” remember to ask yourself “what would I wear?” and “how do I want to put things together?” Because that’s something I forgot all too often.

Dress, Lotty Dotty Vintage  (similar here, here, and here)| fur collar, vintage/gift | earrings, vintage/grandma’s | leaf brooch and headscarf, vintage/thrifted | corset beneath, c/o Orchard Corset | boots, Amazon | tights, Target | belt, belonged to another dress

Standing On My Own |

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  • Modern Vintage

    What a fabulous post – I found it really thought-provoking and inspiring. I haven’t quite worked out yet where I put myself – nearer where you are now, I think, but not as boldly or as confidently even though I’ve got more than ten more years in the bag. I do have some professional limitations (or do I?). It’s interesting how, in the way you put it, our wardrobes and the way we dress is a metaphor for so much else.

  • SaraLily

    I am in love with this cozy look – the tights and the scarf are the PERFECT match. Ahhh!

    Also, YES to everything said here. It used to bother me that I didn’t look as perfectly pinup as some of the other bloggers because I don’t wear makeup or do vintage style hair, etc. But it’s now become something I like – my blog is MY BLOG. I’m a little bit pinup but also a little bit cutie retro and sometimes can be vintage.

    I love that I stand out in my everyday life – I am surely the only gal in my office (heck, probably company) who wears a petticoat everyday, and I am FINE with that!

    If we all blended in and didn’t stay true to ourselves, life would be a bit boring 😉

    • The Eyre Effect


      I mean. Unless you want to. I love love love your hair and your beautiful makeup-less face, seriously. What was it I heard someone say once… like… pinup is for everyone, not just those who strictly adhere to the most popular look. It’s for the housewives, the office workers, the full-vintage wearers and the reproduction collectors. I think pinup is more an idea and an attitude than the technicalities of what you’re wearing or how much makeup is on your face or how perfect your hair is.

  • Aurè

    hello,ciao!…Fabolous look! so Stylish,so Creative,so Unique…so Cool…so Artistic!…You’re a great Artist of Style and this outfit is really celebrating your gorgeous Silhouette…You shine Charisma…cheers!