Fashion,  Love

Fancy

I haven’t been around much lately, have I? Who knew that planning a wedding would take up so much time? ๐Ÿ˜‰

These pictures are nowhere near the level of amazingness that Mr. Owl’s pictures are, because usually by the time he gets off work and we’re all full from dinner and ready to take pictures, it’s dark out (darn fall and winter light time!). Also, I took them while I was photographing all of the things I needed to sell out of my closet, so they’re old. But I styled this dress so well, I decided to keep it.

That, and Mr. Owl really liked it.

This is also the only recorded time I have photographed these tights. I adore these tights. But they are completely run-tastic now, and I should probably throw them away. I need more.

I always seem to rip the prettiest tights within the first day, though. I’m talented like that.

I want to switch gears for a minute away from fashion and talk about a secret I read the other day on Post Secret. For those of you that don’t know what Post Secret is, basically… strangers send a man their secrets anonymously on a postcard, and he shares them online and in books. It’s pretty amazing.

But the other day as I was scrolling through, I saw one that said “I wish I could be imaginative enough to invent an impressive sex life instead of always telling the truth… 25 year old virgin.

Now, I am a virgin, and so is Mr. Owl. We’re 24 and 25, and we seeย nothing wrong with being virgins. It is something that I was brought up to protect, to be happy about, not to be ashamed of. It is something to be tucked away and saved for a person you deeply love, and who loves and cherishes you.

And in the light of that secret and Amanda Todd, a 12 year old girl who was not taught that her self worth is more than flashing her breasts to a strange man on the internet and, after massive bullying, recently committed suicide, I wanted to say: your self worth does not depend on sex. It does not depend on the sexual attraction others have towards you, nor the sexual conquests you have made, nor the stories you can tell. Your self worth is in what you do with your life, the choices you make every day, the personality traits you have, and in the God who loves you and died for you despite every bad thing you have ever done.

I don’t flash my faith around on the internet a lot, out of respect for my fellow bloggers and readers and their religious or non-religious stances, and to be honest…I am afraid to let that last sentence be because I know there are a lot of people who would disagree with my beliefs and who might take offense at my saying the above. I am downright terrified that readers I know and love will be angry with me for displaying my religious affiliations on the internet. Identifying with any faith can be a scary thing nowadays. Especially a Christian faith.

But I want you to know from the bottom of my heart that I love you. That I see your worth not because I have a big heart, butย becauseย of my faith. I want you to know that I don’t care what you have done, what you haven’t done, what you think, what you do, or who you are… you are loved. You are worth something to Someone much, much bigger and better than me, but also to me. I love you because you areย you.

I didn’t know that typing this post was going to get so emotional, but I am sitting here fighting tears after typing all of that out. I am terrified to post it, but I think it’s something I needed to share. I want you, the girl wondering if she would be accepted in her circle of friends if they knew she was a virgin, the boy afraid to tell his peers that he’s never slept with anyone, the person who thinks that all of his or her worth lies in having a boyfriend or a girlfriend… I want you to know that it’s okay to be you. Love is so much more than sex. Someone someday is going to come along and think you are the most amazing person in the world, and they willย not think that because of anything you can do in bed.

I have to leave for work now, and I am going to hit publish on this before I can change my mind and edit out things I’ve said that might get me backlash.

I implore you to see past any differences in belief we might have and see into the heart I am laying open.

Dress: thrifted; Tights and heels, Target; Bag, Payless; Earrings, Icing.ย 

You are loved.

I love you.

 

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39 Comments

  • Elizabeth

    I read your blog all the time but don’t really comment, but I had to thank you for posting this! I am 22 years old and have never had a boyfriend, much less really anyone who was interested in me except a few creepy guys. It’s been really disheartening because I have friends who get a lot of attention, making me wonder if all my physical “flaws” (acne, glasses, etc) or shy personality will keep me from ever finding someone. I’m a Christian too, but sometimes it’s hard to keep going because our culture is just flooded with movies, books, etc teaching that happiness comes from finding that “perfect” guy and having intimacy with him regardless of marriage. Thank you for reminding me that God alone is perfect and He loves us more than we’ll ever know. Whether or not I find someone, I know He will be more than enough for me and my true satisfaction will come from Him.

    Thank you again! I love your blog. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Sarah With A Bow

      “I am 22 years old and have never had a boyfriend, much less really anyone who was interested in me except a few creepy guys.” If you add a clause about constantly crushing on people who will never want you back, you’re talking about me!

        • Margaret Selene

          I think you have a whole club of girl readers who are 22 and have never had a boyfriend (and only crush on guys who are never interested) and I’d like to join it! ๐Ÿ˜‰ I totally cried reading this, and it made me realize how long it’s been since I’ve commented! I love reading your blog, it gives me hope that someday I will find a guy someday. All in God’s time, it’s just too bad that I don’t have God’s patience! Hahaha.

          • Eccentric Owl

            Yes, join! We can call you all… The Waiting Hearts club. I like the sound of that. ๐Ÿ™‚
            I have missed your comments! I am glad this touched your heart, and gave you hope. I have always been the optimistic one who says that someday, there WILL be someone for everyone. I used to have conversations with a good guy friend of mine, where I always told him he’d get married someday and he never believed me. And on Saturday at his wedding, I gave him a hug and said “I told you so!!” ๐Ÿ˜‰
            I don’t have God’s patience, either! Hehe.

    • Eccentric Owl

      Oh, don’t get disheartened! My fiance was my first boyfriend, and he happened when I was 23, by which time most of my friends were married. I have glasses, I had acne, I got hit on by MANY creepy and socially awkward men and boys. I know exactly where you’re coming from! I always wondered if there was something wrong with me because all the attention I ever got came from the really weird, awkward guys who didn’t know how to socialize, or really, really creepy men who flirted with me while I was working at the coffee stand.
      And the one guy that I liked when I was 20, who everyone thought liked me…led me on for an entire summer and then suddenly started dating another girl. It totally broke my heart.
      But it is totally worth it, I can tell you, to have a one and only love. It’s worth the nights of tears and the learning and enduring weird and creepy guys, and it’s just… it’s definitely worth waiting for the RIGHT one, the one that is made just for you by God, and not only that… the one YOU are made for.

      Thank you for reading, and for sharing, and for waiting! God will be with you through it all. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Nancy Francis

    Gorgeous outfit. I’m wearing very similar shoes right now, but with wooden wedges ๐Ÿ™‚

    Don’t be afraid to express Religious opinions. Its a sad state of affairs when people feel like they will isolate themselves from their friends (and blog friends), just by sharing opinions. While I don’t share any religious affiliations with you (or anyone of faith, for that matter) I still value hearing your thoughts, and enjoy hearing that people find such strength in their faith.

    • Eccentric Owl

      Ooh, the wedges sound so cute!

      And I love that you said that– you value hearing thoughts and enjoy hearing that people find strength in their faith. I love that, because I feel… y’know, I don’t care what peoples’ religious affiliation or non affiliation is, I still like them. I still want to know their thoughts, I still love them as people. Who cares if we have differences of opinion– I might not like someone’s shoes, but that doesn’t mean I won’t still respect their fashion choices. It’s a bad comparison, but you know what I mean, I hope!
      Thank you.

      • Nancy Francis

        Whoa, I didn’t say anything about getting along with ugly shoe wearers!! kidding ๐Ÿ™‚

        Our differences should unite us all, not isolate us – and I definitely appreciate your opinions. And your adorable love story ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Sarah With A Bow

    I can appreciate that you are stepping into your own and are really wanting to put the real Kristina on the internet–look how far you’ve come since letting Mara go! I hope you do not experience backlash because your use of faith has come out with the intention to deliver a good message, religious or otherwise, and to spread kindness.

    Also, girl, this outfit is killer. Too bad the tights are runtastic–you’re gonna have to go get some more before they disappear like all good tights, haha.

    • Eccentric Owl

      Thank you, Sarah. I have never liked bringing up religion simply because I don’t want people to think I’m trying to be some sort of Bible thumper, and also because there are some pretty fanatic religious people in the world who totally use religion as a cover to spread their own judgmental and hateful agendas.

      But there are times, like this one, where I definitely believe that who I am in regards to faith has shaped how I view subjects like this, and I don’t want to disregard that simply because I am afraid of what people might think! So thank you for your support, regardless of how we might differ!

      And also, thank you! I am really bummed because they have no more of these tights, except for a size smaller which do not fit me. *sigh* Oh well. I’ll just have to find some good mimics.

  • Love, Miffalicious.

    First of all, you are such a beautiful human being and I love you. You look lovely as always, and your message shines so true and bright. I’m as excited as you are for the wedding; I WISH I COULD BE THERE WITH YOU. LOVE YOU.

    Love, Miffalicious. [www.miffalicious.com]

  • dellagraceslife

    That’s something I’ve always struggled with on my blog- I’ve never been shy about mentioning church and God, but I feel like I should talk about it more. But offending people and ending up on a hate site is one of my biggest fears. Sigh.

    This post is pretty great- I’m glad you shared.

    (And you look fantastic in that dress.)

    • Eccentric Owl

      I know what you mean; offending people and getting angry feedback has always been a big fear of mine. I’m a people pleaser, and it’s just hard to get people who disagree and let you know their very strong feelings on the subject. But I think people are always more understanding than we think! I know from the responses so far on this post that my readers are THE best people, and they understand what I’m trying to say whether they agree with my faith or not. It’s lovely!

      (Thank you. ๐Ÿ˜‰ )

  • Runes and Rhinestones

    I’m not Christian, but I admire other people’s faith because it gives them so much. I’m glad you brought up the Post Secret – it’s good that in this day there are still people who care about others, and people who remain virgins despite the horrendous amount of pressure to have sex at younger and younger ages. You were brave to bring up this topic, and I really admire that too ๐Ÿ™‚ You look beautiful in that dress, and I love the tights! I always end up ripping the ones i like best!

    • Eccentric Owl

      Some of the Post Secrets make me so sad, but those particular ones hit home for me. I think because I did spend years wondering if I was attractive in the eyes of men before I realized it wasn’t what I look like that made me attractive, so I just want others to know that they are worth more than what they can physically provide. Especially with the younger and younger generations that are pressured to give up their virginity in order to be accepted.
      Thank you! I always rip my favorite tights; I think it’s because I over-wear them. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Quotation Marks

    On a shallow note, do you know the clear nail polish secret? I carry clear nail polish with me whenever I wear tights or nylons- if you put clear nail polish on a run, it stops it where it is so it can’t get bigger! It has saved me many pairs of tights!
    And more seriously, thank you so much for your message to people everywhere, especially those waiting in the wings. I think it is real love to offer this message to your readers :).

    • Eccentric Owl

      I do! But usually when I rip tights, it’s like a huge gaping hole that runs so quickly I can’t nail-polish over. Hah! It’s just my luck.

      Thank you. It’s overwhelming just how awesome my readers are, that I can put my heart out there and they respect my opinions and are just… so wonderful!

  • Kelly

    Those are fantastic tights! ๐Ÿ˜€ (And I always get the biggest runs in all my tights! It leaves me rather forlorn!)
    And thanks for this wonderful post! (It’s great to find kindred spirits!) I commend you for stating what you believe in a loving yet completely honest way! ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Comy

    For starters, you look beautiful in that dress. I’m glad that you’ve decided to keep it.

    As for the rest of your post – I’ve said (wrote) it before and I’ll do it again – you are amazing. I admire you a lot. I wish I could meet you in person. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I love you too! ๐Ÿ˜€ And God loves us all!

    • Eccentric Owl

      Thank you. I’m glad I decided to keep it, too. Now, I just have to actually WEAR it. ๐Ÿ™‚

      I wish I could meet you in person, too! Maybe someday, if I get to travel the world! I love you, too! And thank goodness He does!!!

  • Anita Jacob

    I can’t see any runs in those tights??!! and you really do look lovely in that dress!! well you are a lovely person..so the dress actually looks lovely on you ๐Ÿ˜‰
    I think it’s awesome that you wrote a post on how you truly feel and I totally agree with you! The external world does put pressure on everyone to “be someone” and that someone most times is not who we truly are…and to be reminded that it is okay to be who we are, that we are perfect just the way we are, that our “imperfections” make us unique and perfect. ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Eccentric Owl

      There was a run on the back of them. I am pretty good at hiding runs now. ๐Ÿ˜€
      Thank you! I’m so glad; I seem to have the most amazing readers in the world, who, even if they don’t agree with my personal beliefs, still respect the message I’m trying to put out there. I wish the world didn’t have so many pressures, especially on the very young, but hopefully people like us can help make those pressures easier to deal with! And yes, we are made exactly the way we are for a reason!

  • mariecarolk

    I’m starting to wonder how many times I can say “You are so freaking fantastic!” before it becomes creepy. Approximately 50? If so, I think I’ve gone up a few levels of weirdo, just by reading this ๐Ÿ˜›

    But seriously. You truly are amazing Kristina. I admire your bravery in posting this–I often feel like it’s inappropriate to talk/write about religious or political ideological topics in such mediums like blogs (unless of course that’s the ultimate theme!) or Facebook. But sometimes your religious identity can be such a huge part of who you are, it’s a little difficult to not talk about it.

    I was actually deliberating about whether or not it was appropriate for me to ask you what you thought on this topic! Haha ๐Ÿ˜› Guess now I know. Anyways, thanks for this.

    • mariecarolk

      Oh and this dress is fantastic! I want those tights now. Post secret is so difficult for me to read. Sometimes I’ll read one and it’ll resonate with me for weeks at a time.

    • Eccentric Owl

      You are never creepy. ๐Ÿ˜€ Hehehe. Thank you.

      I agree; I rarely talk about religious or political (well, I’m not very interested in politics, but…) things on the blog because even though it’s my journal of sorts, it’s public, and it’s a way of communicating with the world. And I don’t want to communicate in an offensive way.
      But feel free to email me and ask me about anything at all; if there’s something you’re not sure is appropriate to ask in a comment, I don’t mind answering emails. ๐Ÿ™‚ I love answering emails!

  • PeacockWings

    I thought I had left a comment yesterday, but I may have been mistaken. Anyway I wanted to say first that I have those exact same earrings ๐Ÿ˜€ Secondly, I respect you and Mr. Owls decision to wait. While I am not really sure where my “faith” is, I would like to say that I wish I had waited, not for religious reasons and not because I don’t want my little bundle of Joy I have now. No, it’s nothing like that. I wish I had waited so I could share that special moment with someone on my wedding night. I was lucky enough that my first time was with someone I love and still love and am very close with to this day, but he is not the man I will marry or am with now. None the less, congratulations and you have my most respect for your decision ๐Ÿ˜€
    Love, DeAnna (www.peacockwings.wordpress.com)

    • Eccentric Owl

      These earrings are so great! I rarely wear them because I forget about them. But they’re so pretty!

      That is definitely a good reason to wait; I know even with kissing, I never wanted to kiss anyone but the man I would marry, which some people might find a little extreme. But I just wanted to save it so that I would only have memories of one person, and so that it could be special. ๐Ÿ™‚ But even more so with sex.

      Thank you!

  • Adile BKK

    I just wanted to say, the article was great. And you are very brave to share this. I am 23 and I am a virgin too. This is how I was brought up. And I am proud of that. I’ve heard the story of Amanda Todd and I am deeply sorry for her.

    I am a blogger too btw. So if u want to check my blog, it’s Adilebkk.wordpress.com

  • Girl

    I like your post. ๐Ÿ™‚ Some things are worth waiting for and I truly agree with your stance on chastity before marriage. Girls, we should never let the evil thing known as The Mind to let us think any less of ourselves based on how many guys (or lack of that, like me) you have as conquests. Oh btw, congratulations on your engagement Kristina! ๐Ÿ™‚

  • kelly loh

    AMEN. I’m seventeen and constantly hearing about how it’s weird that I’m a virgin and yeah, I bet sex is fantastic when done right, but I’m not in a hurry and it’s really not any of their business, is it? As a Christian I completely understand your fear of exposing your faith. Being attacked on the internet for it sucks. But I think that if Christians like you spoke up more, and were the squeaky wheel instead of those ones who show up in news papers talking about how everyone is going to Hell because blahblahblah and spreading hate and ignorance than people wouldn’t think so little of us. Thank you for posting this. I’m sending this post to my friends!

    • Eccentric Owl

      Good for you! It’s definitely none of their business. I hope you are continually encouraged to stick to your guns and wait. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I know several friends who have said they wished they had waited for various reasons, and one of those is not even a Christian.

      And I hope your friends are encouraged, too! You have a great attitude.

  • Jeanne

    Lovely pictures, amazing tights!

    Your strong beliefs are something that drew me to you in the first place, though I don’t necessarily agree, I admire your humility and sincerity when it comes to your convictions. I hope everybody sees it this way.

  • Violet Corniun

    You. Are. Amazing. Thank you for this; it’s something that needs to be heard in society for sure. And thank you for your bravery in posting it; I know it wasn’t easy. <3